A new year dawns and the internet is flooded with inspirational, uplifting tweets, posts and videos all about people’s successes and achievements in 2017; their goals and aspirations for 2018.
Meanwhile, I’m just sat over here feeling distinctly “meh”.
December started out and was quite promising. I wrote a review of a local pantomime which absolutely smashed my highest ever views in one day. Then the Christmas rush kicked in, the posting schedule fell by the wayside and the views evaporated into thin air.
After Christmas, while other bloggers were merrily writing their Christmas haul posts, rounding up 2017 and setting their resolutions for 2018, our household entered a kind of quarantine. Mr Mess and Mini Mess suffered tummy bugs and myself and Miss Mess got nasty colds which lasted all the way through until new years. Any posts I had planned just seemed like far too much effort. All the positive, “go get ’em” attitudes on Twitter and Instagram just made my own lack of motivation and drive even more self-evident.
Even writing this ranty, whiney post is taking far more concentration and willpower than it should be. Frankly, I’d rather be playing Kingdom Hearts.
I’m not really sure where that leaves A Mess In A Dress in 2018. I’d love to be fired up and ready to create some epic content, but honestly, I’m not sure I have it in me.
Blogging takes a colossal amount of work, and one of the MOST unfair parts is that the amount of work is not directly linked to how successful your blog is. I’m tired of working my arse off, sitting up late every night after the family are asleep, writing posts, editing photos and self-publicising and feeling like it never gets recognised.
While others are celebrating their blog opportunities, their collaborations, their accolades and awards, I feel like I’m doing a whole lot of shouting into a void. And I’m not really sure why I bother. I know there are a few people who enjoy my content (or claim they do) but would they really notice if it just stopped? And are they interested enough for me to continue slogging my guts out?
Do I have what it takes to keep this blog going? Do I want this blog to be successful enough to keep giving and giving, while getting very little in return? Do I even know what I want out of the blog any more?
I don’t really have the answers. I don’t know right now. I was so uninspired by the blog that I didn’t even remember that NYE was my 4 year anniversary. I just let it slide. All I do know is that when I think about writing a post, or taking photos, I’d rather just be playing computer games or reading my books. So, for now, that’s what I’m going to do. The rest will happen later. Or it won’t.